“Oh, we’ll remember this night when we’re old and gray
Cause in the future these will be the good ol’ days
Oh and we’re arm in arm as we sing away
In the future this will be the good ol’ days.”
The Script- Good ol’ Days.
Happy New Year to you dearest reader! It’s this time of the year when we all look into the rear view mirror known as the past and reflect on the year we’ve just had (read my blogs to find out what I got up to). Our achievements, our failures, our loves, our losses, new schools and new bosses. I’ve said before that I like to make every year better than the one I just had but one can’t put glory into 365 days a year. In the end the slog of those 365 days become blurred and summarised into a timeline of photos from our best moments- the highlights of what stayed with you from 2014.
“I don’t know what’s right and what’s real anymore
And I don’t know how I’m meant to feel anymore
When do you think it will all become clear?
‘Cause I’m being taken over by the Fear.”
The Fear- Lily Allen.
Apart of me worries just how can it be possible for 2015 to top 2014? I turn 20 in 2015 and I embark on my third and final year at Keele University. It seems like it all really did just happen yesterday; or maybe I just live in the past. “Some days stay gold forever,” to quote The Wanted.Granted I’ve got the first half here in the USA still and I intend to make the most of it but it feels as though I’ve reached the peak. No 2014 wasn’t 100% fabulous on a day to day basis, I argued, cried and lost friends and made new ones- just like all of us do. Lows became highs and highs became lows. Planning a day trip isn’t difficult and I’ll most definitely embark on some more when I return to England but the closer it gets to returning, the more I push that thought from my mind. It leaves my chest feeling tight and raw to bullet point the next chapter when this one isn’t yet finished. To ponder the moment when I last see people more often than not brings a tear to my eye, so I try not to dwell too much. I’ve met some people here in the USA, that I want to be friends with always. It’s sad knowing that one day I won’t be able to share a beer and conversation or have dinner with my American friends. But at least I’ll have reasons to go back to the USA in the future. Elizabeth and I have shared so many experiences that we’re bound together by our time at USM. We’re lucky to have that, some people have nobody to empathise with about their specific journey. I have high hopes for 2015. Not expectations, but hopes. Maybe I’ll drop the “L-bomb.” Maybe I’ll figure it all out. Maybe I’ll get through more of my bucket list and the “what now” won’t seem so daunting anymore. I hope that one day I’ll be a “quite something”-the term I use for people who amaze me, by making the ordinary extraordinary just by living and breathing by my side; who make me question how it’s possible for one person to exude such awesomeness. And because tomorrow really is never guaranteed, I hope that if “my time came” to have made a positive impact somehow.
Let It Be.
John Lennon was correct in stating that “life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.” Of course it is! The people you meet from the starting line to the finishing line whilst at university are really going to show you the world and broaden your perspective of it. The whole of my 2014 was building up to moving the Mississippi on August 13th. I’ve always been a big thinker but since starting university I think and question everything I know and think on bigger topics on a much bigger scale. But that’s the point in all this- moving away is meant to shake you up and teach you valuable things. And 2014 is without a doubt one of the defining years of my life. Granted, I don’t know what I’m going to do in the future but I hope to someday have found my “calling.” Perhaps I’ll get so disgruntled with love stories that I’ll put all that “bad medicine” from my own experiences and from ones I’ve seen and heard about and put pen to paper in the form on a novel. It’s just an idea. I don’t know. But who knows? That’s the beauty of a new year. It’s a blank canvas and we can paint it anyway we want to- January being a defining month for us all. So use your paintbrush wisely!